Saturday, 5 December 2009

Roots

I have never been rooted to the ground. I feel that I have always been airy, flitting through the clouds, not too concerned about earthy matters. Never weighted down by these, I never did search for my roots- still haven’t, though maybe it is time to begin. I know I am of a certain caste, class and creed. And it never stuck me to observe those around me, and look at how they differed from me. Not in a negative way- positive tones only.

So, when a friend asked me about my culture, I was a little clueless (still am), and I started thinking about it. Why is it that I have never bothered to try to find it? - To look for my past, present and future in relation to contexts around me? I follow customs and traditions that are practiced in my house. But that isn’t all there is to culture.

Why do I not know my language? I only started asking this question to myself recently… in the past few months, that is. Why is it that I am more comfortable expressing myself in English than in my mother tongue? Is my language dying out in me? It is only in the near past that I have begun to feel that my language is unique, and special. There are some words that I would never want to replace, nor ever could, because only my language offers me those words and the impulse that throbs behind those words.

In fact, a simple word, like ‘rattam’ (“blood”), can mean so much more. It is not only blood, but passions and angers. It goes way beyond what ‘blood’ means. I do know that English offers this too. Obviously. However, it is only around now that I realise that I took my language, and my roots for granted.

It is time I get grounded. It is time I waft back down to reality, and to what I have to claim as inherently mine.

2 comments:

Susan Deborah said...

Dichotomy and dualism form part of every thinking individual. Its difficult to get out of this. The 'grounding' that you are talking about will only come if YOU want to make a grounding for yourself. It just does not happen.

Sankar said...

Culture is something deep within,like a reflex action,it helps you react with least effort.For a nation or a set of people this is the highest goal they strive for.Even if many do not achieve the goal it is the constant striving and the respect they show for people who are near or have achieved the goal.As susan says it just does not happen.You STRIVE.Our culture has several great goals!!!