Wednesday, 17 October 2007

Brown paint on a yellow wall

Sitting on a bench
Near a yellow wall.
Trains on their tracks stop
Near the yellow wall.
Brown paint on the yellow wall.
A smear as he spits
The brown paint on the yellow wall.
And the fisher-women lean
On the yellow wall.
Sit and stare at
The brown paint on the yellow wall.
A man with one chappal
And a dirty, torn lungi walks
To the yellow wall
And squats with a cloth and a can of water
To wash off
The brown paint on the yellow wall.
The trains pass by
The yellow wall.
Getting up from the bench
Near the yellow wall.
No more brown paint on the yellow wall
Until the next man passes by
And another smear as he spits
The brown paint on the yellow wall.

Slow Walk

I slow walk alone.
No one by my side
To take me in his arms.
No hope of love- solitude.
Sparkling moon, say hello
To him who lives far far away-
In Never land- happy and joyous.
And I slow walk alone.
Cool waters glisten a melody
The winds weave a melody
The stars shine a melody
Unheard by me,
For I slow walk alone.
And thoughts besiege my fortress
And flood me with emotion.
And the tears unwarranted flow by
And join the earth below
For no on is by my side
To take me in his arms
And so I slow walk alone.

Big Foot Adventure

Her yellow paw stepped on dry leaf.
The ray of the scorching noon-sun
On her tense, striped back,
Reflecting off her black eye.

Big Foot Adventure-

A ripple of a breeze
As she spots her prey.
The firm paw crouches
Amidst the tall dry grass.
The power of every muscle
Controlled in her foot step.
Not a sound, not a rustle.

Big Foot Adventure-

Her ear perked up
And a sudden effortless leap
And a pounding, thunderous chase.
And that paw, the claws all out
grabs the deer.
The strength, the force,
As she bites into her midday meal.
The power emanating
From her tense, striped back
As her claws rip through her food
And then she leaves
Turning around, proud,
With her tail up and head held high.
The quiet triumph shown
In her vicious-soft paw…

Big Foot Adventure!!!

Wednesday, 8 August 2007

The Iron fist of Love

I was sitting in a solitary daze and it was beating.
It was a beat of hard red flesh against my ribs.
It was a drugged hurt. It was all red.
Not the soft, calm and peaceful aura
Of elegance and charm,
But sharp, hard, angry, possessive.
It wrought its iron fist
Around the throbbing piece of flesh.
And it caught.
Choking- an unsaid desire to touch
What I cannot even see, perceive.
That innocent smile stopping a beat
And holding me in ice-cold glee.
A yearning to reach out and grasp
Something that will never be mine.
And cling on ferociously-
To fight for, to die for.
Why? Why? Why?
Why no answer?
A million questions and doubts.
But what if he forgot the question was ever asked?
What if the intention was never known?
Why is it so tough to ask?
Why does that iron fist pierce into
The cold red of my heart?
Petals of tenderness
Blush as they close the core truth shyly
But with fierce possession-
Tender tentacles that grip…
The iron fist that wraps a quiet heart.
Solitude not truly wanted though always sought,
Longing for what is not near-
So far… ah, so far….
Yellow moon, you are closer-
And you know that the iron fist
Grabs at my heart and hears it throb.
Why cannot I tell?
Why is my silence quieter that yours?
Ah… but that is the iron fist that closes my longing heart!!!

rising from the ashes

Well, I am not me. I am not what i was that is. After all people change right? So there you go... I changed. Someone told me that i have been reincarnated. I said i was like a phoenix!!! Phoenix flames! change... well, yes, I have changed a lot and all my friends poured in their ladel of influence to help me on my way. When I entered college, I was shut up inside myself. And i could not for the life of me talk. Well, now i am more talkative. I guess I've also learnt to endure a lot of things that dont really please me. Or rather, instead of endure, should i say put up with... because endure is too strong a word. Well, yeah, so I do put up with a lot of things that Im not really pleased about. I am a little more patient though i need more of it. not that ive touched upon the 'other' side. The goa side. Well, its the 'lets experience a little of everything' side. Not a side I thought I would have when i was in school!!! And then, more important than everything else, the MCC complacency set about me like a little charm and worked its way into my schedule. So now my pretty "goody goody" attitude is gone forever. Hey wait, dont think i dont do good work any more. I still put in my best (or at least near best) when I want to. It's just that, maybe, as of a while ago, I ahve been mccianised! I should tell you, its not all bad. Its about the most open, most fun-loving yet lax college...... Go MCC!!! :)

Monday, 18 June 2007

Redness and colorlessness


Somehow colors fascinate me. I was washing my face of and there was the drip of a bright reddish-pinkish something that washed itself down my nose from my forehead. The slight drips of blood. Of love. What all connotations! Anger, just red. The red carpet of glory. A flash of a sword. Somehow, of all, its blood that stays imbibed into your memory. Blood is not only vengeance- do not mistake me. It is also sorrow… definitely. It isn’t necessarily death is it? It is also life. Blood fury and love. Blood death and birth. Redness. The property of just being- the property of being red. Inscriptions of life stories unheard, buried in ice cold redness of anonymity. The being buried and being born. It all revolves around blood. The slight little piece of nothingness that exits a mother’s womb and chooses to struggle. Why does no one talk about that blood? The blood shed for a child, the blood shed by a child. The terror of being unprotected in a harsh world. Out in the cold of the worldly atmosphere, of friendships and enmities… more the latter than the former. The trust that there will be someone to get you through the better part of your life just to let it all go at the end. The stabs of the heart- that throbbing something that makes everything into somethingness- a meaningful something that makes you you!!! Love and prayers of hope and fate. Sorrows and pains.
All that…. Summarized in just one word… RED.
Somehow, I relate thoughts and emotions to colors. Feelings, despairs, hopes, joys, sorrows. They are all colors. And then when there isn’t a color that can get me through a feeling, I’m blind. The feeling overpowers and that is a color in itself- the color of colorlessness. The color of a fluid watery something that has no substance and just can’t take the shape of something solid and substantive. It becomes the color of a confusing thought. The color of air… Nothingness.

Sunday, 13 May 2007

Flames... ceremonial

watching the flames flicker with tear drops in eyes and a constant chant that buzzes through the ear drums. That is the ganapathi homam that is done for entering a new house. And thats what i attended today. I figured that the chanting was actually interesting to listen to- though i couldnt understand anything! And the flames made me think that all life seems to be consumed in flames. Pretty profound! What is the use of all this if we spend money to get it done... what does it achieve except excessive pollution and loss of time? Well, then i was off to play scotland yard...
if one hasnt heard of it, get the game- its just brilliant! its one of the best cops n robbers game that can ever be played on a board game! Its too tough to explain, but its just brilliant! and of course, i can never be a robber, so im always on the safe side- if im not, well, as usual i get caught! n then we played pictionary- ah now that, im reasonably good at.... not great, jus reasonably good- i figured i cannot draw human beings, but i can draw say flowers! which i did too- n ppl congradulate me on how well it came out! well- neva know if its got to do with how ive improved or if its really good! one cant rely on family for opinions!
But what came last in the day was the dance! wow! that was one hell of a trip! two whole hours of proper bharathnatyam! brill! its just inexplicable- the moves and the beat of the rhythm, i guess i could go on for ever about dance.... just makes me smile and well, obviously the exercise is great! well...... just- dance is, i guess, the best flame of all! the flame of passion and expression!!

Thursday, 10 May 2007

Nothing to do but think....

Yesterday, the world just turned pitch black.... ahhh yeah, the current went. Got some time and interest in suddenly goin to the terrace and star gaze. And of course think. Well, star gazing isnt a speciality in me, i figured, cos i ended up twirling and dancing on the terrace!!!! Well, then the thoughts .... about friends and mainly about time. And then thought about flames (dunno where that came from!!!). Well, flames! what a beutiful creature. It has a life of its own- its own passions and its own anger and solitude. Living its own imagination! Then i went back down and learnt (or rather half-learnt) to break open a coconut with a butter- knife!!! yay!

Wednesday, 9 May 2007

Flames of Black or White

Blackness
Black Beauty
Dark Lady
Black Gold
Black Silence

Whiteness
White Death
White Lie
White tear
White Anger

Endless Confusion
Thoughts and feelings
Words and Silence
Melancholic Mirth
Honest Affections…
Flames flicker and die.